miss manic-depressive...

-is sick of rehearsals, but finally starting to enjoy them
-has started listening to Christmas music. it's november.
-is frustrated.
-has many many ideas about theatre and education and summer and camp and growing up...
-misses you.
-ate kraft dinner with her roommate when she wasn't hungry.
-gets excited about spinach wraps, apparently.
-couldn't care less about assignments. uh oh.
-has no exams!
-thinks that the world is a funny, funny place.

I'm feeling bleh, and knowing I shouldn't, so here it is, ladies and gentlemen...

Things in my life that suck right now:

-rehearsal schedule. ew.
-no good food in my house.
-needing a new roommate.
-so much homework.
-no time for friends/fun stuff.
-missing my mom. a lot.
-confused about something.
-a wrecked ankle. thanks a lot, stair.

Isn't it funny how you can feel really bad, and when you list the bad things that are going on and bringing you down, they aren't all that bad at all? In fact, in the scheme of things, they are meaningless and all things that will go away very soon. They are almost embarassing to feel bad about. I'm definitely stressed, I have to schedule time to think, and that usually gets overtaken by my need to do laundry, buy food, finish a project, etc. I have lost touch with a lot of people, not completely, but enough to make me sad. I'm really looking forward to Christmas break, when I can just stop worrying about work and time and I can sleep as much as I want, go to the gym (haha), see people and get ready for camp and le projet. But my life is definitely going okay.

So, to make me feel better, here's the good things in my life right now:

-dorky, musical loving friends here who get excited about showtunes and discuss mounting productions with me.
-being able to rant to great people who know how to make me feel better in ways that I'd never been comforted before.
-learning never-can tell games for two hours, and getting all worked up about them with a group of twenty year olds.
-stimulating classes.
-Freaks and Geeks with Tamara.
-my boyfriend, proving he's not superficial, practically encouraging me not to shave my legs. awesome. since all I wear is sweats and jeans thanks to rehearsal ("movement clothes"), it's a good time.
-plums. yum.
-caught up with homework, for now.
-almost Christmas break.
-my mom is visiting next weekend. look out wine sellers of Montreal.
-good people.
-feeling ambitious and planning projects for myself next summer.

Life is decent. Good.

Update on the workings of Miss Meghan...

Things are good here, I guess. I love my classes, especially theatre for young people. I'm doing a play, the Caucasian Chalk Circle. The schedule is wicked hectic, five rehearsals a week, four to five hours a rehearsal. I have learned that although I love going onstage, acting is not for me, and this will probably be the last time I go onstage, at least at this level. It's so professional I can't even deal with it, we go in early to warm up (and everyone makes funny noises and rolls around on the floor). We all have labelled cups so that we can take water breaks and we have to check a call board every day. Before rehearsal we have to do character work, and if we don't the director will know. It's intense. Not for me. I miss the days where I showed up and pretended for a bit. But it's good to see so many good actors for when I graduate and need actors...

Tamara is leaving in December, which is good for her life, bad for mine. She's been a kickass roommate and I will miss her. Finding a new one is really scary, because I can't help but think of what happened last time. If a wigger ballet dancer shows up, no deal, of course.

There are a number of things troubling my thoughts, more than usual, but I can definitely deal. My schedule is so hectic that mostly I wish that a) I was in bed, b) I was quitting school and moving to Cuba, c) I was hugging someone or d) doing laundry or groceries or paying bills or cleaning my room, or cleaning the bathroom and kitchen... all the things I just don't squeeze in. So there isn't a lot of time for stupid thoughts. Phew.

I wish I was going to Ottawa next weekend for Great Big Sea and a girls night. I miss girls nights, and they aren't the same here. Good, different, but I miss my Belleville girls. And the token guy, of course.

My ankle, which I sprained on the first Monday of classes, still bugs me. I went to the doctor, I have a "type three" sprain, and we all know what that means. (?????) That's right, eight to twelve months for a full recovery. MONTHS. I don't have that! My director gave me a brace, which I wear a lot now that it's getting cold. I'm going to be one of those old ladies who can tell you when it's going to rain, and that's the only plus.

Okay friends who read this, this is what I need. People to visit me next semester. Having a Belleville roommate who knows me awesome well is great because I talk to her about pretty much everything. I'll be in Belleville withdrawal next semester. And even though there's some awesome people here for me, they've only known me for one and a bit years. So visit? Please? I'll beg later, this is your advance warning.

I'm wearing a purple shirt, and it makes me feel healthy.

Sorry for the pointless rambling.

Peace out,
love Meghan

Singing in the shower leads to a better day.

Staying up all night working on a ridiculous research paper on Anton Chekhov does not.