AAARRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

Argh. ARGH! FB is a giant idiot. GIANT IDIOT HEAD. Tonight I was humiliated. We had the tech rehearsal for Bravo Bayside (which I was excited for last week). It was time for me to do my monologue. Sounds like a perfect time to set up the band! That girl is up onstage by herself, screaming to be heard over all the people talking anyways, let's move around and carry heavy equipment! Heck, let's not even learn the cues at this TECH REHEARSAL!!!! Who needs that? Let's make her feel so stupid that she doesn't even act, just says it as fast as she can so she won't be embarassed anymore. Then she'll really impress everyone. Ack! Then not even see when the lights need to go down, which is crucial, because she is supposed to TAKE OFF HER SHIRT!

I don't know when I have been so humiliated. I came home, screamed a very bad word at the top of my lungs, ate half a pineapple, and went back to school for the Footloose number. I had a little bit of an okay time, we made a little mosh pit for Beyond Control. Footloose was fun. However, afterwards, I went to the music room to get CM and RB, because CM had a headache and I was driving the two of them home. FB was there. All pleased with himself. Which pissed me off. There was nothing at that rehearsal worth being pleased about. The quality of the acts was excellent. However, there was yelling, fighting, and it was so disorganized I could cry (and almost did a few times!). So, I gave him a little talking to. I told him that this rehearsal should have been done last week, that not one person left that rehearsal feeling happy about performing (people wouldn't perform for fun would they?), and that I was extremely frustrated and mad with the no respect for performers issues, etc. And I kept pushing, I didn't let him get away easily. Which is an accomplishment for me, I used to be a pushover. Then I went outside and screamed. And broke my keychain.

I feel better though. I didn't want him to get away with letting everyone leave that rehearsal feeling like shit. Stupid man! I am full of anger. And I am extremely embarassed. However, people made me feel better. CM, RB, AW and I have had a long chat, AR, TT, etc. Yay for good friends.

I spent a good portion of the weekend with SD2, CM, JS. Making a Bravo Bayside video. It was fun, they are fun people, even though they are stupid boys. I did no homework though, and the consequences are bad. *sigh*. Life is so... scattered? Complicated? Eep. I don't have time for anything. I've gained back all the weight I lost this summer. That is the worst feeling in the world. I am tired, and grumpy, and behind. Oh well. That's the way it's been going for a L O N G time, and why should I expect it to change? I'm fine.