Big cities

I always liked visiting big cities when I was younger and coming from a very small town. Now that I live in one, however, I find it very overwhelming. Today I just missed a metro, and was the first one on the platform. Two guys, not much older than me, sat down at the bench beside me. They are talking very loud, in french. A girl who looks about my age walks down the platform, passes them, then me. They start making lots of whistles, it sounded like they were calling a dog. She walks all the way to the end of the platform.

A girl our age walked onto the other platform, and they did the same thing. They got louder. I couldn't understand what they were saying. I looked over, and accidentally made eye contact with one, and they turned to me. I didn't know whether it would be safer to ignore them, or get up and walk down the platform. I turned my head away, and I heard them say something about me not understanding French. Another girl crosses the other platform, and they do the same thing. So in the metro at this point there are four girls, and two loud guys. And who wins? The guys, of course. All of us girls avoid looking at them, sit awkwardly in silence until the metro gets there.

This pisses me off to no end. Why did they do that? Why did we put up with it? We outnumbered them. What gives these guys the right to make us feel uncomfortable in our travels? It's bad enough when you get the guys who stare you down. But the guys who treat us like we're fucking animals? I hate myself for letting it happen.

The big city is full of people who make me feel uncomfortable. The homeless veteran who stands at the bottom of the escalator in the school metro. The crack whore who asks for change but has money to put on lots of eyeliner by the supermarket. The man who claims to be a single father, but can be seen with a bottle of alcohol when he's not harassing people. The strung out guy on the bus, who pulled the cord at every stop and kept smacking his wrist against the bar. The guy who followed me and kept asking me "you know me? You know me? What's your name?". The guy who yelled at me for walking up the escalator.

Everyone else gives you sympathetic looks and continue on their way. Why are people hurtful to strangers? How do people come to a point where they live on spare change? The world scares me. I have my little safety, white suburban girl bubble. I have no addictions, other than chocolate and dancing. I have a little bit of money and the constant support of parents. I have people to turn to. I harass no one. I want people to find their place, their happiness. I doubt it's on the street. Or harassing girls on the metro. Shut up, boys.