"I won't dance, don't ask me..."

Today our production class casted Lion in the Streets. I can't say I'm satisfied. I know the cast will be awesome. I know I was given an incredible amount of work. I just have this thing where I have to have the most or equal to the most amount of work. And I don't have that amount... I'm NOT complaining, I'm thrilled to be a part of this production in any way, and it will be a real challenge. *Sigh* I wonder if I'll ever be pleased with what I've got in my life. I know I should be, and sometimes I am. But it's an on and off kind of thing.

I know I'm an incredibly hormonal changing teenager, but it's like I will never be satisfied, I will never have enough to do, will never get enough recognition... I miss talking to people, really talking. I'm happy. I'm sad at the same time. I have a rehearsal tonight, I am having an absolute riot with Ring Round the Moon. This always makes me happy. But when it's done, I have two days to go over all the things that are bugging me, and that I know shouldn't be bugging me. I feel like I will never be pleased! I know I should be! I KNOW!!!!! I just am not. I don't know how to change it. Oh dear...