Believe it or not, I am not a joke

My friends? I have absolutely lost touch with some of them. I can't decide whether that's good, because that will be one less person to miss, miss, miss when I move, or to be very upset. They are also changing, a lot, again. Again, some for the better, some for the worse. I'm finding I love some of them more than I thought, and some people I just shouldn't hang around with.

I've also been feeling very used. Used for rides, used for a listening ear, used as a joke. People have started a game where they TRY to offend me. THAT IS NOT FUNNY. Maybe I am easily offended. Or maybe I just want to live in a world where discrimination is not a joke and is taken seriously. I know you're just joking, and I will admit, some of it is funny.There are other funny things. Better for your health. I have started calling people on behaviour that isn't kind or healthy to others. I'm not perfect, I know I'm not, and I'm not trying to say I am. But I am doing what little I can as a teenage girl to make the world around me a little more kind. And people seem to be resenting that, avoiding me, and acting strange.

So I'm sorry everyone. I'm sorry that I have become "negative" because I stand up for the rights of all people. I'm sorry that I call you on things that are hurtful, because you don't really mean them. I'm sorry that I have become an activist for human rights, and that you think that's funny. I'm sorry that I am growing up, and wondering where the hell is the good in the world when the people I hang around with, the "good people", like to piss me off. They enjoy pissing me off. Thanks, friends. Thanks.

If you read this, I'm in need of hugs. I feel like shit because my friends don't like what I have become. I have finally started trying to make people see what I see in the world. That it is not a perfect place, that just because we live in Canada doesn't mean there is equality and justice for all. Maybe I'm being a conceited bitch. I'm sorry if that's the case. I should just not be honest and open? If you would rather not be friends with me, that's okay too. Whatever you like. Please, just let me know. I don't want to wonder if I've lost you or not. I'm sorry if I hurt anyone.